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Tag: cognitive distortions

graphic of head with could, would, and should bubbles

Shoulding ourselves to death

May 9, 2019November 19, 201918 Comments

I saw a post on topic of shoulding recently on Grounding Growth and wanted to continue the conversation.  Definitely check out her stop the should worksheet. The word should can have several meanings, but the most relevant here is the one from Google dictionary, which Grounding Growth also referenced. "used to indicate obligation, duty, or … Continue reading Shoulding ourselves to death

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glass that's half full/half empty

Where’s the line between pessimism and realism?

April 23, 2019November 10, 201934 Comments

I got thinking about this recently after talking with Meg at Why does bad advice happen to good people.  Meg has the amazing ability to optimistically see the silver lining in almost any dark cloud, and I very much do not.  It makes me wonder, though, whether that makes me a pessimist, or am I … Continue reading Where’s the line between pessimism and realism?

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Book cover: How to be miserable: 40 Strategies You Already Use by Randy J Paterson

Book review: How To Be Miserable

March 6, 2019October 12, 201924 Comments

How To Be Miserable: 40 Strategies You Already Use by psychologist Randy J. Paterson challenges us to make our lives more miserable than the already are.  The sneaky bit?  He'll make us realize that we're already doing a lot of those things inadvertently. The book is broken down into 40 lessons, which are divided into … Continue reading Book review: How To Be Miserable

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drilling into block of wood

Drilling down to core beliefs

March 4, 2019November 1, 201915 Comments

Core beliefs are the underlying beliefs that we have about the self, others, and world, as well as the future.  They arise as a result of the experiences we've been through, including trauma.  They are held as absolutes, and tend to be expressed using words like "always" or "never".  They can take the form of … Continue reading Drilling down to core beliefs

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mythical dragon beast

Mental myths that get in our way

August 28, 2018December 9, 201923 Comments

We tend to create a lot of rules about how we should think, feel, and act.  We may believe that there is some sort of objective truth to these rules, but the reality is they're really just mental myths.  These examples come from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy: I don't deserve to get the things that I … Continue reading Mental myths that get in our way

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computer-generated ellipse fractal

Overgeneralizing an unsafe world

July 31, 2018September 8, 201926 Comments

I've written before about cognitive distortions, and in this post I'm going to focus on overgeneralization. When something bad happens, the message I take from that is the world is an unsafe place.  This feeling of being unsafe spreads from whatever is related to the problematic event to the world in general.  People hurt me, … Continue reading Overgeneralizing an unsafe world

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two minds connecting

What, You Don’t Do Mind-Reading?!?

July 23, 2018November 22, 201924 Comments

I've talked before about my tendency to experience mind-reading as a cognitive distortion, i.e. thinking that I know what others are thinking.  I also do the reverse; I expect those close to me to know when something's wrong.  The problem is, they're no better at mind-reading than I am. I feel like I'm not very … Continue reading What, You Don’t Do Mind-Reading?!?

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magic hat and cartoon rabbit

Pass the magical thinking hat

July 19, 2018October 9, 201917 Comments

In psychiatry, magical thinking refers to the idea that there is a causal relationship between one's thoughts and the outside world; basically that thinking something makes it so.  I tend to combine magical thinking with avoidance to produce a thought pattern of "I won't think about it and therefore it's no longer real."  It's entirely … Continue reading Pass the magical thinking hat

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brain-shaped word cloud: thoughts, feelings

Cognitive distortions: Getting personal

April 12, 2018November 1, 201937 Comments

Yesterday I outlined some of the common types of cognitive distortions.  It's one thing to know about them, but actually recognizing them in ourselves can be a lot harder to do.  It's all well and good to try to look for evidence against a possibly distorted thought, but what if there is a preponderance of … Continue reading Cognitive distortions: Getting personal

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thoughts-feelings-actions infographic

Cognitive distortions in CBT

April 11, 2018November 1, 201924 Comments

I'm sure many of you are already familiar with cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), but I thought it was still worth taking a look at cognitive distortions, a key ingredient in the CBT soup.  When we're not well (and even when we are well) we tend to fall into certain common thinking traps.  Recognizing that we're … Continue reading Cognitive distortions in CBT

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woman sitting in bathtub surrounded by flowers

Allowing vulnerability

February 26, 2018October 9, 201928 Comments

I had a tough weekend.  It started off badly with a friend contacting my brother to check up on me, which rocked the walls of the little cave I've built for myself.  And then something happened with my safe person that made me feel very unsafe.  The dark voice inside my head kept repeating "He's … Continue reading Allowing vulnerability

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gargoyle

Reining in the thought gremlins

February 6, 2018October 9, 201922 Comments

One of the (many) things I'm working on is checking myself on my thought gremlins – depression-related misinterpretations of things happening around me.  Not stopping the misinterpretations (I'm nowhere close to being ready for that yet), but noticing them for what they are. This past weekend I was exchanging emails with someone in my life … Continue reading Reining in the thought gremlins

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seesaw shown on a road sign

The mental illness teeter totter

December 23, 2017October 9, 201914 Comments

I've spent much of this month trying to decide whether or not to spend Christmas with my family.  It's a subject that has caused a lot of torment and a lot of tears. I used to love Christmas.  It was always a small, cozy, stress-free family affair. When I'm depressed, though, Christmas just doesn't matter. … Continue reading The mental illness teeter totter

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