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In this series, I dig a little deeper into the meaning of psychological terms.
This week’s term: vulnerability
Wikipedia has a couple of different pages related to this topic: one on social vulnerability, the other on cognitive vulnerability. It says that the work vulnerable derives from the Latin word vulnerare, which means to be wounded. The diathesis-stress model explains psychological disorders as resulting from a combination of predisposed vulnerability and external stressful experiences; protective factors help to mitigate this risk.
Cognitive vulnerability results from erroneous patterns of thinking, which makes people more vulnerable to certain psychological problems, such as mood disorders. Insecure attachment and stressful events contribute to this process.
Social vulnerability refers to the inability to handle the external stressors that one is faced with. Structural factors, including social inequalities and political factors, can play a role. Entire communities may be vulnerable in what’s known as collective vulnerability, “a state in which the integrity and social fabric of a community is or was threatened through traumatic events or repeated collective violence.”
I don’t think it would be unfair to call author Brene Brown the queen of vulnerability. She has written multiple books and given TED Talks, and is pretty all-around amazing. In her book Daring Greatly, she challenges the idea that vulnerability represents weakness, and instead says that “vulnerability sounds like truth and feels like courage”. She explains that vulnerability involves emotional exposure, and while this may not feel comfortable it is at the core of all emotions. Daring to be vulnerable requires a sense of worthiness to combat shame and beliefs that we are not good enough.
I am highly selective about who I’m prepared to be vulnerable with. I’ve had some negative experiences, and these are hard to overcome. I suppose I’m vulnerable on my blog, but there’s really not much that could happen in terms of negative repercussions with that. I suppose all I can do is look for ways that I can be vulnerable, and at least try to push myself.
Is being vulnerable something that you struggle with?
Sources:
- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_vulnerability
- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_vulnerability
- Daring Greatly by Brene Brown
You can find the rest of the What Is series here.
Hmm…. vulnerability… I’m pretty much an open book. Maybe too open. But I often tell myself that if I tell others secrets about me, they can certainly feel free to share with me as well. Likewise if I listen to someone’s problem, I figure they’ll do the same for me if/when I’m feeling sad, or whatever. I like how vulnerability can go both ways, ya know?
Great post! It’s got me sitting here lost in deep thought.
I agree with you, vulnerability can be a mutual exchange.
I’m a highly sensitive person and I always am sensitive and very vulnerable. Nowadays, I learned to not be too open by people who not care. It’s just important to be vulnerable by the right people. I love people who are open and vulnerable. I feel like I can trust them. It’s increible brave to share the hard stuff in your life. I loved this post. Great explanation ❤️👏
Thanks! Figuring out who are the right people to be vulnerable with is an important balance to be able to find.
I am a continuous work in progress with vulnerability. I am grateful when others are vulnerable around me and try to be the same, but sometimes my walls and masks kick in and I have to move them aside. I know since I’ve really been working on it my relationships have really changed for the better. But still I have to work at it. I do believe Im vulnerable in my writing though. Another thought provoking post my friend! 😊💐
You do extremely well at bringing vulnerability to your writing ❤️
Thank You, Ashley ❤️
Ooo this is a really interesting one to dig into a little more. I think emotional exposure and daring to ‘put yourself out there’ are very hard to do because it’s uncomfortable and we get conditioned by our experiences, such as what you’ve found with negative experiences in the past. I agree with Alexis. I find this a constant work-in-progress for me too, but do think you are vulnerable and brave in your blogging, and I like to think I take little steps towards opening myself up a little more in personal posts too.
xx
Thank you! Yes blogging can be a good way to take those little steps and gradually be a little braver.
you were bullied
sullied
driven
from your workplace
me i was bullied
for who i was and was not
and what i did
and could not
do to this day is all
eh?
words?
vulnerability is so scary at times. I like to pretend that I am capable of it, but when it comes down to it, I freeze like a deer in headlights when it presents itself.
Yes it can be really, really hard.
Being too vulnerable is definitely something I’ve struggled with past and present…not an easy characteristic to live with most of the time, especially when also I dealing with depression and anxiety.
Yes, it’s definitely tough.
I HATE feeling vulnerable. I think that is the only feeling that has every actually caused me to shut down during therapy.
I’ve struggled with that too whenever I’ve tried therapy.
Reblogged this on Laina's Collection and commented:
This really hit home – an excellent post about a very common theme in my life 💕🌸
I think we all should embrace our vulnerability because we all our vulnerable. But i think i always find it hard to show my vulnerability. It’s so difficult to do just that. I would recommend you to watch this video about this topic and it’s only 4 minutes long.
https://youtu.be/PJsJ96yyVk8
https://youtu.be/PJsJ96yyVk8
The link is not showing up 🙁
I used to hide away my entire life inside of me, but as a result of therapy over the summer I’ve realized how important vulnerability is in deepening relationships and receiving support. I am really trying to be more vulnerable. I track it on my diary card for DBT. So far, being vulnerable has greatly improved my life. I feel like my family understand me much better, I am less ashamed of myself, and I have better friendships.
Oh that’s really good 🙂
Yeah it is. 🙂
Okay… children are vulnerable (at least i was very trusting and open and loving) and told to be careful, weary, and then we still get hurt, then told to be vulnerable. 😔 Badass advice and i have no reason to wonder why i am so moody! I know why!! 💔
Yes it’s so hard when people hurt us even when we do what we’re “supposed” to do.
I think it can be difficult to show our vulnerabilities to just anyone, for me there’s a fear of being judged, of thinking I’m not strong enough/good enough, fear of being offered unwanted advise or criticism. Being vulnerable requires trust.
I always had a story of fear. Until I realized. I realized that having fear and showing up to life anyway = bravery. That being Love is bigger than being fear.
Very good way of putting it.