It’s all well and good to try to be more positive in life, but I can be a grumpy old llama sometimes. I figure if I direct that at inconsequential everyday things it will allow me to blow off steam without it having to spill over too much into other things. So here are a few of my pet peeves, and I forewarn you, I have a potty mouth.
- Wearing an underwire bra when it’s hot – either during the summer or in the winter with the heat cranked way too high; this is just inhumane
- Speaking of undergarments, getting a wedgie while out in public – trying oh-so-subtly to extract your underwear out of your butt-crack, but of course not being subtle in the least.
- Weight fluctuations (especially with psych meds!!!) and trying to figure out what to do with your old-weight clothes. Hang on to them in the hopes that they’ll fit again someday, knowing that if you do get rid of them then you will lose weight and get annoyed because you have to spend money for clothes in a size you already had but got rid of?!
- Insects and related critters in my home. It’s mine, not theirs, so fuck off!
- Landscapers making noise when I’m trying to sleep. I’ve come very close to bellowing out my window at them to shut the fuck up.
- People in the grocery store who are totally in the way and happily oblivious to that fact. In my neighbourhood there’s a large immigrant population, and for whatever reasons they seem to most often shop en masse as a family. That means there are 4+ people obliviously in the way rather than 1.
- Drivers who make left turns very slowly so that only one other car (and of course it’s not mine) can manage to get through on the advance left turn signal
- People who are habitually late. I detest lateness so much that I’m always at least 10 minutes early (and usually more like 30 minutes).
- Speedos on anyone other than an elite swimmer are a crime against humanity and should be banned from public beaches
- People setting up shop on the sidewalk trying to solicit donations for charity. It’s one big guilt trip – they know it, I know it, everybody knows it. And then there’s the entrapment involved in phone calls to solicit charitable donations, where the only way to extricate yourself is to hang up on the poor volunteer calling from the children’s hospital who hints that you’re a bad person if you don’t donate to the poor kids with cancer.
- GIFs: I know they’re popular and a lot of people love them, but to me they’re just creepy and weird.
What are some of your pet peeves?