Weekend wrap-up

wrapping paper, ribbon, and twine

Here’s a look at my week in review:

  • My woodpecker family is spending more time away from the roost doing there own thing, so I’ve had less bird-watching time.
  • I’ve decided to dive head-on into spring cleaning, and each day I’m ticking a couple of tasks off my to-do list.
  • I’m struggling in my communication with my family.  The emails I get from my mom are mostly about what they’re currently watching on Netflix.  I’m sure she’s being superficial for fear of scaring me off, and I really don’t know what I want much less how to ask for it.
  • Cognitively I’ve been less on the ball this week.  I feel overwhelmed more easily, and I feel busy even when I don’t have a lot to do.  I’m having to look up words and sayings because I’m not confident that what pops into my head is correct.
  • I haven’t been as consistent with tracking mood and various other things that I normally try to track on a daily basis.  I’m not sure if it’s a good sign that it’s just not as important, or if it’s a bad sign that I’m slacking off.
  • I’ve been reconsidering a trip to central/eastern Europe that I’d been thinking I might do in the fall.  I’m just apathetic about it and it feels like it would be a lot of work, so I’m thinking it might be more appealing to go to a major European city and just plunk myself down in one spot for a couple of weeks.  It bothers me that I feel so little interest because normally travelling is my greatest passion, and, given how much travel experience I have, going anywhere in Europe would be easy-breezy.
  • For one of my casual nursing jobs, they will email me with requests to do home visits to see certain clients.  I check my work email every day, and I find each day I’m really hoping they won’t have asked me to see anyone.  I’m not sure if I’m just getting too comfortable not working much or what my issue is.
  • My tv and internet service provider screwed up some changes I’d requested to my service and now they’ve screwed up my bill.  It’s annoyed me and it’s still not sorted out, but I’ve been able to prevent a major freak-out.

So, that’s my week.  How’s yours been?

24 thoughts on “Weekend wrap-up

  1. Meg says:

    I think my week has been fine, but my mind tends to have issues compartmentalizing time. I can’t remember what happened or when it happened unless I search my memory with extreme effort.

    I know how you feel, not wanting to get called for the nursing job. I used to feel that way all the time about my jobs working with people, and I thought I was just being lazy, but I was actually overwhelmed and terrified of being around people. (I’m not saying that’s the case with you–I sure hope it isn’t.) But the point is that I think you’re being too hard on yourself. I can’t work at all, and you’re so productive and helpful professionally!! Keep up the great work!!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Michele Elkins-Hoffman says:

    I have been in this space-many, many, many times. It sounds to me as if unplugging for a bit may do you some good? You know, do your favorite things, spoil yourself, light candles, turn on your favorite music, take a lavender Epsom salt bath, eat that brownie. Do this for as long as is necessary/and or the rest of your life. You’re doing great. There is a saying in the Rooms that I love: each and every day you stay sober is a miracle. So, at the end of the day, thank God for that miracle.~

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Karen says:

    I think you’re doing great. It’s easy to focus on stuff that you can beat yourself up about, things that you aren’t doing so much or thoughts that are avoidant. I love that you have woodpeckers to watch, we have a grey squirrel that runs along our garden fence, pretty cool!
    Maybe you could reignite your passion for travelling by taking a short trip not too far away?
    Perhaps next week will feel more positive xx

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Luftmentsch says:

    I’ve also been procrastinating regarding a possible trip, albeit in the other direction (from Europe to North America, albeit the USA). I told myself to get Pesach out of the way before I decided what to do… and now it is out of the way and I still don’t know what to do. I’m not a seasoned traveller at all, in fact I’ve never been away without my parents, so I’m quite scared. I also don’t know if I can really afford it or when to go because I don’t know if I’ll still have a job come 22 August (no job means free to travel in late August/early September, but also less money to travel with). So I’m not sure what to do at all. I’m not really a great traveller, but I really want to meet some online friends who live in the States. Maybe I should try influencing them to holiday in London…

    Liked by 1 person

    • ashleyleia says:

      It can be hard to figure out where the balance is between pushing yourself out of your comfort zone but not pushing so hard you set yourself up for failure. I have no idea when/if I’ll be able to figure that out for myself.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Barb says:

    I don’t have any wise words for you. I guess you just have to do what you’re able. And if a trip to Eastern/Central Europe feels like a ton of work, maybe that’s a sign that it isn’t the right time to go. 🌻

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Bonnie A. McKeegan says:

    I can relate to the spring cleaning. Today I tackled the disorganized boxes, bins, and bags of mostly kidlet stuff in the garage. Thankfully the husband jumped in to help. Tired and my feet hurt 😉 Maybe the big trip you are thinking about is just not the right timing? Sounds like you are worried it’s more about depression…

    Liked by 1 person

  7. 4msbipolarmom says:

    My week has been busy, sad, 😠, busy. Ive been battling with things at work. And its affected me alot. Insomnia for a month now means that sleep deprivation is ADVANCED. My psychiatrist says I need to sleep hygiene myself more… Sometimes I wish I could just sleep and sleep peacefully for a day. The tabs dont work. But becoming more active in the Bipolar WordPress community has totally cheered me up. 🌞

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Kerry says:

    I wish I could do spring cleaning! I’ve only moved as far as spring shovelling….lol!

    Vacation anywhere sounds fabulous. Wherever you do, I’m sure you’ll have a wonderful time!

    Liked by 1 person

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